The Book of Joe: About a Dog and His Man
Written and Narrated By: Victoria Price
Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
More like The Book of Vincent… and… thank GOSH Times Change…!!!
Oh good golly gosh!
From the get-go this is a little audiobook that had me cringing in despair, outrage, disgust, chagrin, dismay, horror, shock, and oh yeh? The narration was a weeeee bit on the appalling side…
But will YOU like it?
Depends…
You like animals allowed to roam freely, leaving them hit by cars and crawling to bushes to die all alone?
Check. First chapter…
You like animals NOT spayed/neutered, leaving them to roam (FREELY!) far and wide, impregnating others’ pets, litters of animals left in their wake?
Check. MULtiple accounts throughout the story.
You like pet shops? Where the CLUELESS queue up and choose, on a whim, an animal they may or may not take care of, they may or may not exchange, they may or may not love, they may or may not just, quite simply, ABANDON in the country?
Check. Check. Check. Sooooo many freaking Checks aaaaalllll through, ad nauseam.
You see, The Book of Joe was written and lived in a different age, a time when getting a pet was like scratching an itch, filling a void in the life but not really considering the reality of living with an animal, keeping it safe, loved, honored. FREAKING PET SHOPS, for cripes sake! Think animal mills, where they’re bred without ceasing in deplorable conditions.
Okay, I’m getting kinda sorta distracted, so I’ll just give you a bit o’ what-all you’ll find in this reeeeally looooong 4-hours and 14-minutes.
Vincent Price loves animals. And this is “The Book of Vincent” in that Joe, a much, well, kinda sorta, loved, mutt is touched upon, an animal-themed but usually career-themed anecdote is relayed, and then a little ditty about Joe is touched upon again. You want to hear about a camel falling in love with Vincent onset? Gotcha. You wanna hear about how Joe changed his life? Not so muuuuuch.
Getting a cat on a whim. Getting a dog on a whim. They don’t get along, the cat is miserable to the point where someone else steps in and demands better treatment? Ho-hum to Vincent. Just an anecdote to jot down, no self-awareness whatsoever. Getting baby chicks for Easter and then abandoning them cuz they actually SURVIVED and grew into roosters? Yup, another oh so charming anecdote.
…freaking pet shops…
Compounding my distress was daughter Victoria Price’s droning narration, wherein I had to jack m’ listening speed up from x1.2 to x1.7 cuz it’s like she’s reading to spastic toddlers who need to be soothed into a stupor. I mean, she’s okay and all, but GOOD COW! Pretend your intended audience has an attention span of greater than .0000037 seconds, yes please?
-AND-
Consider whether you think the story might bear up in an age where we actually give a rat’s patoot about the Fuzzy Accomplices we share our lives with. This was just pretty horrifically tragic. And tragedies do NOT make for a charming little listen.
Yeh yeh yeh. A different time, a different era. Take it all within the context of the times and all that jolly rot.
But oh goodness. How glad I am that, tho’ things can be TERRIBLE for animals nowadays?
At least they weren’t a Horror Show that we called Love.
Mr. Price’s emotion wasn't Love; it was an Itch, one he scratched without thought or feeling…
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